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      英語世界
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      翻譯擂臺第19期點評
      發布時間:2017年11月06日     發布人:nanyuzi  
      來源: 英語世界
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      【原文】

       

      [1]我們已快要臨到這人世悲慘之境地,在這世界上,稍有人格的民族,都無法忍受的。[2]我們不能不應戰,至于戰爭既開之后,則因為我們是弱國,再沒有妥協機會,如果放棄尺寸土地與主權,便是中華民族的千古罪人?!璠3]如果戰端一開,那就是地無分南北,人無分老幼,無論何人,皆有守土抗戰之責任,皆應抱定犧牲一切之決心。

      ——摘自1937年7月蔣介石在廬山發表的抗戰演講


      面對來勢兇猛的日本侵略軍,蔣介石此時已經發現和平無望,故下了抗戰到底的決心。1937年7月31日,蔣在廬山發表了一篇激憤無比的抗戰宣言,所選其中這幾句尤其感人,可名垂青史。


      [1]中,“已快要臨到”,參賽譯文如“We are almost and nearly come to … /We are almost on the verge of…/…is almost on the brink of…/ We are on the threshold of…”等,似都可以,但還可更簡練些。


      “悲慘”,大都用了misery、miserable、tragic、pitiful、sad and shocking等,都可接受;而“境地”用得較多的有dilemma、predicament、plight、occasion、stage、circumstance、condition等。分析起來,dilemma的本義為the state of uncertainty or perplexity especially as requiring a choice between equally unfavorable options,如:①He was faced with the dilemma of whether or not to return to his country.(要不要回國,他進退兩難。)②The issue raises a moral dilemma.(這個問題引發了一個道德上的兩難抉擇。)predicament和plight也類似,都有difficult and unpleasant 的性質,如:①the club’s financial predicament(俱樂部的財政困境)②The country’s economic plight is strangling its scientific institutions.(該國的經濟困境阻礙了其科研機構的工作進展。)顯然,這三個詞用在這里,性質上都不夠準確。而occasion,其原義為“a time when something happens, or a case of it happening”,如:①It is an occasion for all the family to celebrate.(這是個值得舉家慶祝的時刻。)②It is always an important occasion for setting out government policy.(這歷來都是闡明政府政策的重要時機。)在此處又顯分量不夠。至于stage,則相差更遠,其義為a period or state that passes through while developing or making progress,即發展進程中的一個階段。所以,在選擇詞語時應首先了解其英文原義。就此而言,circumstance、situation、condition是比較適宜的,盡管也有程度和范疇的區別,不過其中有著基本的相通因素:circumstance – the conditions and facts that are connected with and affect a situation, an event or an action;situation – the combination of circumstances at a given time; condition – a state in a particular situation。特別是condition,在不同的語境中有著差異較大的多種含義,如一般來講,可有“The report can probably provide some information concerning current political, economic or financial situation.(該報告可能提供當前政治、經濟或財務等相關方面的一些信息。)”;具體而言,“Conditions for the poor in Los Angeles have not improved.(洛杉磯窮人的境況仍未得到改善。)”;個人來說,“We have all been in similar embarrassing situations.(我們都遇到過類似的尷尬局面。)”,甚至,“他身體欠佳。(He is not in good condition.)”“生命垂危(critical condition)”等??紤]到與前面用到的那些形容詞相搭配,condition用在這里似更為適宜。


      對于“人格”,參賽譯文用得最多的是personality和character,如which is unbearable as long as one has the least personality / which cannot be endured by any nation with a little personality / where even a nation with a least character is not disposed to suffer it / where any nation of character in the world can’t bear等,顯然有根據字面意思、查字典尋找對等詞的痕跡。其實,personality(the complex of all the attributes-behavioral, temperamental, emotional and mental – that characterize a unique individual)主要指人的特性和魅力,如:①a woman of great personality(極有個性的女人)②Through sheer force of personality Hugh Trenchard had got his way.(休·特倫查德完全憑借個人魅力就能隨心所欲。)③他很有個人魅力,非常風趣。(He is such a personality – he is so funny.)而the character of a person or place consists of all the qualities they have that make them distinct from other people or places,如:①That is the other side of his character.(那是他性格中的另一面。)②The character of this country has been formed by immigration.(這個國家的國民性是由移民形成的。)③中國特色的社會主義(socialism with Chinese characters/characteristics)有參賽者用了national pride,似乎吻合,但是該詞一般用于和平、積極的意義,如:This success has greatly boosted a deep sense of national pride.(這一成功極大地提升了民族自豪感。)而原文的話語是在民族陷于戰爭災難、面臨亡國滅種之時講的,所以顯得不協調。類似的,還有self-pride、self-respect、self-esteem等。還有參賽者用了human dignity,如“We are going to be confronted with a miserable situation which nations with human dignity can't be unbearable.”,而該詞一般是在更大或比較的語境下講的,如:It’s an affront to human dignity to keep someone alive like this.(如此維持一個人的生命是對人類尊嚴的冒犯。)同時應當指出的是,can’t be unbearable為否定之否定,成為肯定(bearable),故意思恰好相反,此類錯誤在參賽譯文中并不罕見。其實,dignity即可,如:①We should treat others with dignity and respect.(我們應當尊重和善待他人。)②She’s got too much dignity to descend to writing anonymous letters.(她是個自尊心很強的人,絕不會自貶身份去寫匿名信)。


      故此,該句不妨譯為:We are to be trapped in such miserable conditions that no nation with dignity in the world could bear them anymore.


      [2]中,“不能不”不宜簡單理解為“能”,can沒有譯出不得已的語氣,可為have to、cannot but,或更重一點的“… have no choice but …”等。


      “戰爭既開”,有參賽者用了we resort to the war,好像是主動利用戰爭去解決問題,如:She would never resort to the law courts to resolve her marital problems.(她無論如何不會上法庭去解決婚姻問題。)這顯然不合適。


      “妥協”,參賽譯文用得最多的是compromise、relinquish、abdication、concede、concession等。一般而言,compromise(a middle way between two extremes)有一種對等條件下的平和語氣,如:Some protagonists may come to their senses and seek a compromise.(對抗雙方中有些人可能在理性思考后達成妥協。)故在此處性質有所不同。而relinquish多指財產和權利方面的分割(part with a possession or right),如:①She relinquished possession of the house to her sister.(她將房子讓給了妹妹。)②他被迫放棄對公司的控制權。(He was forced to relinquish control of the company.)顯然范疇有別。類似的還有abdication,其義為a formal resignation and renunciation of powers,參賽譯文如“The abdication of territory and sovereignty will degrade us to be eternal sinners.”應當說用詞造句還是比較講究的。concede與concession類同,因concession 的原義為the act of conceding or yielding,如:①We cannot concede any of our territory.(我們決不能放棄一寸國土。)②There is a call for the concession of certain rights.(人們要求承認某些權利。)


      值得一提的是,“主權”不同于一般的“權利”“權力”和“控制權”,而是sovereignty,如澳門的回歸與香港的回歸不同,不是resume sovereignty, 而是收回了“管制權”(administration and jurisdiction),因葡萄牙從未對澳門擁有領土主權。


      將“是中華民族的千古罪人”譯成we shall be guilty of committing an unpardonable offense against our race,值得商榷:offense是“a lack of politeness; a failure to show regard for others; wounding the feelings or others”,用在此處顯然太“輕”了,如:The book might be published without creating offense.(出版這本書可能不會引起人們的反感。)當然,criminal offense、fatal offense則又有所不同;而our race屬多余,因這里不言自明。


      故此,該句不妨譯為:We have no choice but to stand up and fight back. Once the war breaks out, as a weak nation, there will be no chance for us to make any concessions – a bit of loss of territory or sovereignty will stand condemned throughout the ages…


      [3]中,對于“地無分南北”,許多參賽者譯成“the land will not distinguish between north and south/ Anyone, no matter they come from north or south / regardless of the north or the south”等,其實這只是一種籠統說法,難道就不包括東西嗎?故可統而述之。


      “有……之責任”,一般譯文用了responsibility、duty等,但應注意前面的動詞或介詞的固定搭配,如accept、assume、bear、carry、recognize、shoulder、take、take on、take over、place、acknowledge等,而不是demonstrate、stay、 show等,不應過于隨意。


      對“皆應抱定犧牲一切之決心”,許多人翻譯得很帶感情,似乎用了最重的詞句,如“…with last full measure of devotion / Everyone will have to give up everything that he has /shall combat valiantly at whatever cost unless being subjugated”等,但還應力求找到最恰當、簡約的“那一個”;例如,相比參賽譯文中的to give up,此處用sacrifice更帶一種莊重與儀式感。


      故此,該句不妨譯為:From day one of the war, everybody across the country, the young and the old, will all be mobilized and determined to sacrifice everything as they assume duties to fight against the enemy and defend our motherland. 


      由此可見,翻譯中的選詞用語首先要注重其譯入語的原義,其次才是其引申含義;更重要的是,譯者要能設身處地到原文當時的語境之中,反復體會、比較,從而找到最恰當的表達方式。


      優勝譯文:

       

      @睡不醒的顧冰

       

      We are about to descend into the most miserable situation that life could render, a situation which any nation with a slight bit of dignity could not bear.

      There's nothing we can do but fight this war against the Japanese invasion. As a weak country, we have before us no chance of compromise once the war begins. To lose any bit of our territory or sovereignty to compromise will make us the "sinner for a thousand generations" of the Chinese nation.

      ...When the war begins, every part of this land, south or north, shall be the battlefield and every single man in this country, young or old, must do his duty to defend our country, to have the resolve to win at all costs.

      From "Chiang Kai-shek's Lushan Adress on the Anti-Japanese War. July,1937"

       

      @manny

       

      We are on the verge of such a miserable and tragic life as any nation across the world with even slightest dignity can in no way bear. We must fight by all means. The moment we go to war against Japan, we will be in no position to come to terms with them as it is not in our favor in terms of strength. He who gives away the smallest portion of land or sovereignty would stand condemned through the ages to come. …When the war begins, any man of any age from any part of the country shall have the responsibility to fight with the enemy and defend the land, with the determination to sacrifice all.

       

      @Nicholas

       

      We are on the verge of descending into such a miserable state that any nation with a trace of dignity would deem it intolerable. We have no choice but to conduct armed resistance, and entering into battle would leave a weak country like us no room for compromise and concession . If we gave up even an inch of China's territory and sovereignty, we would stand condemned in the history of the Chinese nation......Once the war breaks out, then all Chinese, south and north, young and old, share the responsibility to resolutely defend our homeland against the Japanese invaders at any cost.

      Excerpts from Chiang Kei-shek's Lushan speech calling on all Chinese to resist Japan in July, 1937

       

      @Lorna

       

      We are on the verge of a tragic stage where no nation with some dignity can bear. We can’t sit on our hands without answering the attack. But in case the war starts, as we are a weak nation, never do we have the chance to give in. Once giving up an inch of our land and sovereignty, we will stand condemned through the ages in Chinese history…. Upon it breaking out, anyone in this nation, no matter where you live, South or North, no matter how old you are, young or old, should have the responsibility to defend our land and the resolve to sacrifice all for it.

      Excerpt from the Lushan Speech made by Chiang Kai-shek in July, 1937.

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